i'm in ur tent, drinking ur beer

so tonight is the M*A*S*H bash at the red cross. i'm looking forward to it. even though i really wanted to wear my pink dress and be a pretty princess and have since been informed that this is a casual event. dammit. but, i do get to wear my "on a mission" shirt which is always a conversation starter, or ender.

"what's your mission?"
"getting away from you"

expect updates tomorrow.

see also - origins

bah

this is never a good time of year for me. between the humidity and blazing sun i'm constantly paranoid that my hair is about to explode and that i smell bad. i'm managing the hair thing pretty well so far, although this new product has a tendency to make my hair 80s-crunch-tastic. that, however, is still better than having my hair be wider than my shoulders. much better. as far as the stanky-phobia goes - if there's a water shortage in b-lo, blame it on me. sorry.

my cat has recently decided to do her best to return to a life on the streets. the truly frightening thing is that she has no issue with trying it from second story windows. my cat = not smart. i may have to declaw her for her own safety, cause i don't know how much longer the screens can hold her weight.

i'm going to the MASH bash tomorrow, which is most of the reason that i'm home blogging as oppossed to porching at this very moment. i'm looking forward to it - i have no idea what i'm going to wear, but i do know that i will have much fun drinking copious amounts of free wine with alanna. wine makes me utterly ridiculous - more so than usual. want to see what that's like - you know how to reach us.

and the other reason i came home. i'm freaking exhausted. the short weeks are always the killers. plus, tomorrow i have 3 big meetings and rougly 17 bajillion things to teach the two new employees how to do. and i need to start being nice to the annoying one. bah, indeed.

ennui

is that french? if it's not, it should be. it's that perfect blend of snotty/emo that screams "je ne sais quoi." but only screams on the inside, like all proper euro trash. mustn't distract from the brightly colored sneakers with loud noises.

so yeah, i'm having one of those days where i feel guilty for being at work. i'm not getting anything done. part of the problem is that i don't actually have anything to do, and the rest of the problem is that i just don't want to. i rarely have this problem at work - i just make myself do it. but right now, all i want to do is go sit outside and get some sun (it's ok, pink looks good on me) and call all my friends and share long distance margaritas. or read alanna's french text books and brush up on my vocab. but, being paid to update my blog - not high on my "want to do" list. going out tonight and celebrating my news from yesterday - top o' the list.

at any rate, i'm really looking forward to this summer and seeing how many times i can drag jess to cozumel in the middle of the day. and staying up much too late drinking far too much and laughing far too loud. and figuring out where i'm going to be living.

oh, btw, i'm opening up the job search to chicago and DC. DC the city, as oppossed to the publisher. so, you gots connections, i've gots resumes.

ok. time to earn my paycheck. i can do this - only 13.75 days left...

good to know

there are few things in life that can't be solved by talking to an old (as in long-time, since this one is younger than me) friend. and if you're talking while munching on a jim's steakout chicken finger sub and drinking a glass of red, it gets that much better that much faster.

i'm nervous about the move. rationally, i know it's going to be fine. it really is. even if i don't have a job or place to live right away, i can always stay with my parents. not ideal, but it could work. so yes, when i use the rational side of my brain i'm totally fine. but it's when i let the unrational (and albeit larger) side of my brain take over i start to freak a bit. this whole "no plan" thing is very new to me and while i'm liking it, it does make me spazz now and again, regardless of how cool i try to play it off.

seriously?

i caught my fifth bouquet last night. FIFTH. and the wierd part is, i don't try to catch them, i don't push people out of the way. heck, i don't even really stand near the front. but they always come straight at my head. so i'm not catching them so much as making sure doc fowler's handiwork doesn't get destroyed. at any rate, it's a lovely bunch of blooms and if i hadn't been so annihalated when i got home perhaps i would have put them in water instead of allowing them to shrivel on my coffee table.

speaking of booze - i think it's best to not drink 6 martinis. not due to the alcohol content (pshaw to that), but rather due to the salt. i was so dehydrated this morning that i'm surprized i wasn't all wrinkly. so, from now on, it's a limit of 4 martinis and then tonics the rest of the night. also, scotch tastes like ass and i'd always prefer to pay for top shelf then drink free well. cause ya know, i make a bajillion dollars a minute.

i made a new friend yesterday! her name is kim. everyone, say hi to kim! kim's fun and always ready to do shots. she also spits when she's drunk and trying to make a point, which makes me feel better for spilling my water. two sloppy drunks are better than one!

but i don't have anything to wear!

i'm going to a wedding on saturday. if you'd like to be my date (you lucky, lucky man/woman) i need to konw by 4:30 PM on thursday. your meal choices are filet mignon, chicken or shrimp. i'd like it if you ordered the shrimp so we could each have mini surf and turfs.

oh, and the open bar is strictly top shelf. now stop drooling. that's not becoming on a would-be date.

i'll link to that!

as some of you may have been forced to hear about, i have been obsessed for the last 7 months with finding a pair of grass green, patent leather, open toe heels. in my size. apparently, these don't exist. i got really close at shoe fly last week, but they were more of a shamrock green, than a grass green. i was going to go for it, for $40 who could beat it, but apparently i needed midget feet. so, a no go.

(as an aside, i apparently named my cat after one of my favorite shades of green. who knew?!)

so, i became desperate. i've searched google. and piperlime (where the good shoes start at $300). and more google. and then some zappos. then i remembered i tried a pair on at aldo. they sorta made my toes look funny, but hey, i'm desperate! and i figured they'd have more. well, they did. i still wasn't able to get the perfect shoe, but it came close in orange. which is fine, as the color was still a bit too jungle green for my taste. and then i got this. combined, they would make one fan-fucking-tastic shoe. for now, i'll settle for two.

color me pleasently surprised

i managed a "b" in that last class. guess i really am smrt after all.

btw, i'm thinking pleasently surprised is periwinkle in color.

2 things before bed

to the girl i saw crying in the bathroom cause her boyfriend dumped her during exam week - your friend was doing a pretty good job telling you what you needed to hear but what she didn't say, and i should have, is this - any guy who dumps you during exam week isn't worth it. no, really. he's not the one, he isn't making a mistake, you can't convince him otherwise and it truly does suck, but if you want to find someone who doesn't make you cry and feel small you need to a) realize you deserve better, b) take the final and c) remember that you deserve better. now blow your nose, you're getting boogery.

the movie i was thinking of is "the remains of the day" and it does not have daniel day lewis in it. however, it does have superman in it, so i'm sure everyone will still want to watch it.

gabsosteel, mba*

as of 8:27 last night i am officially free (FREE!) from school. i did the run-skip of true glee out of alfiero, neveer to return. the fast paced texting of "i'm done - who wants to party?!" quickly followed.

in all honesty, i didn't feel any different until a couple hours ago, when i was lamenting all the stuff i'd have to do when i got home from work. and then it hit me. i have nothing to do when i get home! this is f-ing awesome.

oh - just in case you haven't heard - saturday's festivities have been moved to prespers (aka prespa). still scheduled to start promptly around 9:30ish.

*providing i passed the final. although, even if i fail the final i can still pass the class, but that just feels like cheating. not that i'd complain, no siree. d is for diploma, all the way.

couldn't resist

superhero quiz

i got two questions wrong (but they were on marvel so it matters not) and i'm apparently smarter than dr. doom. hurray!

(i have to say though, that i do enjoy answer b for the green lantern question. if i was a superhero, i'm sure that would be how i got my power.)

no excuses

even though i got burned yesterday and probably should stay out of the sun today, i still find it to be cruel and almost unbearable to have to stay inside and write a paper today. i could go and take my neighbor her junk mail that was mistakenly delivered to me, but that would just be a tease and make it even harder to go inside and stay there.

i found my phone!

thank god, i was starting to freak out about that. how would i find out when it was time to drink/hangout/gossip if i didn't have a phone for people to tell me? but, i learned my lesson. a purse with 10 pockets ten-tuples the chances of misplacement. and "doh!"-ishness.

so, i'm looking forward to this weekend. some good ol' pony racing and mexican holidays. i'm sure they'll go great together. and since we're starting drinking at 2 pm i'll be home in bed early enough to rest up for a day of writing a paper and studying for an exam on sunday. good times.

oh, so i graduate on saturday. johnny's coming in on friday but i may be selfish and not share him that night. but on saturday i think we should all go to mother's and get sloppy. or watch me get sloppy, whichever you prefer. we'll probably get there around 8ish but need to eat, so if you want to join us for food call my newly found phone, or we'll see you anytime after that.

rock.

11 days to go...

i just tried on my cap and gown. it was... wierd. and those hoods are just a pain. i really think the sole purpose of the hood is to remind you that no matter how many degrees you get, you will always feel like a fool trying to "turn the hood inside out" whilst wearing it.

oh, this is kinda fun. not as much fun as the real thing, but it's a good way to pass a commercial break.

WOO HOO!

i just attended my last every class tonight! i never have to sit through boring lectures again!

this is fan-fucking-tastic.

and yes alanna, we will both do some serious celebratory drinking tomorrow.

officially official

June 20, 2007, is my last day of work at the Roz. That's just 15 days after my 6 year anniversary. 6 years! I started there when I was 21 - a mere infant by most standards. I was so shy and nervous. At least, I think I used to be...

At any rate, it was a hard decision to make. I like Roswell. I like knowing all the people, players, vending machines and my job. But I'm happy that I resigned. Cause that means I get to move to NYC! And live with Johnny again. And buy awesome shoes. These are all very good things.

And I have to say, people at Roswell have been great about this. Offering to put me in touch with their contacts in NYC, not yelling at me for leaving... I'll miss it. But I'm really looking forward to July.

(And of course I'm going to miss all of you too. Don't be silly. I just don't want to write about it cause I'll get all droopy and need a hug and I'm home alone. So, if you really want to know, ask me at 44. Oh, god! I'm gonna miss 44 too!)

man, oh man

i am becoming a full-fledged dork. i don't even think i can really hide it all that well anymore. sure, i'll still dress up nice and do my best to not scare the children, but you give me a chance and i will give you a fully annotated discourse on comic books. i'll make plans to go comic book shopping and when i get to Queen City Books and discover them to be sold out of Nightwing Annual #2 (are there really that many other girls in Buffalo who collect comics?!) it'll take some effort for me to not call johnny and ask him to go pick it up at Forbidden Planet and overnight it to me.

oh well. it could be worse. at least it's not stamp or coin collecting. and it's not like comic books have become so all important in my life that i can't function and/or have become destitute. i don't read the books til my homework's done (nevermind that i leave new copies at a friend's house to reduce temptation) and i stay within a budget.

and besides, some good's come of it. i've got one more person on my side of the Batman/Superman debate. :)

secret fortunes

perhaps you've seen them - they look like soda pop cans touting that insides a seed that will reveal a secret fortune if you only promise to give it lots of water and love. thing is, they're not much of a secret - flip the can over and there's a sticker telling you that your "secret fortune" will be something like, "i love you" or "you're great!" not really fortunes, but neither are the things inside cookies nowadays. and then i found one (one!) that didn't have a sticker. it's fortune was unknown. "you're adventurous," my mom joked. "that's just the way i roll," i retorted. so, for the last 10 days i've been waiting for my fortune. know what it is? "adventures await."

i'm feeling pretty good about this.

if she was my landlord...

... i would never move.

The Landlord

ranting and raving

i had my first day back to work today - which was fine, really. things were not nearly as close to a state of disaster as i thought it'd be. and i can breathe, which is absolutely lovely. i really will not get tired of that any time soon.

however, i did do more by 10:30 AM then i have in the previous two weeks. combined. sitting at a bar drinking is nothing. running all over a campus after having your nose (accidentally) hit twice during easter dinner - that's something.

so by 4PM i was exhausted and my face hurt and i was dizzier than i had been in days. which would be fine if i didn't have homework due tomorrow. so i came home, took some (legal and prescribed to me for this very purpose) drugs and waited for them to kick in.

oh, they've kicked in alright. i feel stoned. i've reread the same page 4 times and i still don't get it. so, i'm dropping out of school - with 3 weeks left - and quitting my job. i give up. if you need me, i'll be the one in the soggy cardboard box under the overpass.

yes, that is matt damon

and this is the song i was referring to last night. you must see this movie!

scotty doesn't know

my precious...

i finally bought it! oh, it's so sparkly and pretty in real life...

dude

i have not been this bored in a long time. and it's only going to get worse. my doc told me i need to stay off work for another week, just because. well, just because and because i still get dizzy and light headed. now, i'm not complaining that i don't have work, i'm complaining that i don't have anything else to do. i could clean, but i have a 4 oz. weight restriction and i get motion sick if i move too much. i could do my homework, but, that's just ridiculous. i already watched all the good movies on the free on demand, and i fear what i'll do with the $4 ones. although, "miami vice" was pretty good.

so, i sit either on the couch or at my computer, typing idly. and reading GQ, compliments of a good friend. i like taking the men's style quizzes, mostly cause i get all the questions right, for some odd reason. who knew that knowing the difference between prince of wales check and glen plaid would ever come in handy. but really, asking me the difference between houndstooth and herringbone? too easy.

czech it out

i'm so bored that i'm editing a post that i wrote while bored.

wanna read all about my surgery and see some gross pics? then click on this: the nose knows. but i'm warning you - the pics really are gross. and please don't think that if you don't read my "medical blog" that i'll be upset. that would be silly of me. i mostly wrote it for people who are thinking of having the surgery done - not for people who need to be able to look at me without having revolting images pop into their head. :)

but, back to the point. if you are going to read the icky blog, wait a bit. it's in deperate need of editing and fun anecdote adding.

turtle power?

anyone wanna go see TMNT tomorrow? don't be shy... you know you wanna.

hey there blogger

it's been a while. i woulda posted from hamburg but my parents live in the stoneage (i.e. have dial up) and i can't stand it.

so, the surgery went well. i'll start that new blog and post the full story and yucky pics for those who want to see, but for now i'll give you the synopsis.

• anesthesia made my throat very sore and my brain become paranoid that everyone would see my bum when i went to the potty.
• btw, those IV poles are heavy, which is lame.
• my nose looks normal on the outside, but i have to keep squiriting this gel up it so that it stays moist and heals right, which makes me look and sound like a snot nosed kid. especially since i have to keep snorting it back up and cannot blow my nose for the next 2 weeks.
• this makes me very sad cause while i feel well enough to hang out, i'm too gross for the public to see me. the upside is that stores let me use their employees only bathroom, probably so i'll just get out of their line of sight.
• my cat is obsessed with me. she needs to see me, and preferably be touching me, at all times. apparently 5 days is too long for a fuzz ball to be left alone.
• i miss my parents.
  

“They’re always after ‘me Lucky Charms!”

i saw a leprechaun today. a real one. in roswell's lobby. he was short, fat, in a green 3-piece suit with a bushy red beard, a mischevious grin, knobby walking stick and pot o' gold. i have to tell you, leprechauns are less short and more fat than general mills would have you believe. i'm convinced he was real because i didn't notice him until i almost ran into him, and no one else seemed to notice him except for one wee little irish dancer. it's like he was one of the underground people from that neil gaiman book and i could see him cause i killed the beast. and i do believe it was the luck o' the irish that helped me find my keys later. either that, or it was the luck o' the italian boss who's capable of reading my mind.

i decided to watch "the departed" tonight to get in the mood for st. patty's day. what an incredible movie. i still don't think leo is cute, but now i respect him as an actor. and marky mark should play an angry guy in movies more often. boston looks like it has some gorgeous neighborhoods that i'd love to visit, but i would always stand out as a tourist. i'm in capable of saying "sawr."

mission: wear green was a success. tomorrow will be the seventh day with no problem. the fact that no one noticed probably means i've unintentionally done this before. next year, i'll remember to kick off on march 1. and learn how to say "sawr."

public service announcement

odd

i was walking home from work, bopping along to the beat in my head, when someone yelled out of their car window "get a perm!"

i found that to be rather peculiar and a tad noteworthy.

grrr...

peter martin called me.

hbo isn't working.

my aquarium shrimp crawled out of the tank and died somewhere in my dining room causing an awful stench and i can't find it. i now live in constant fear that someone may want to come upstairs.

i so do not approve.

decisions, decisions...

i've been trying to figure out what i want to do when i graduate. i'm going to europe, i mean, that's a given. free room and board cannot be passed up in foreign lands. and it'd be nice to see the fam again.

but what after that? i was thinking i would just work, but then i perused the ye ol' royal toybox and thought, "hmm, maybe i should go to law school so i can learn to talk like this and specialize in labor law, a field recently near and dear to my heart. or, i could get my masters in something i'm actually passionate about and remember all the correct, technical terms for when i am faced with great works of art." (honestly, i was already contemplating these two ideas, but couldn't find a good way to segue into them before).

if i could afford to go to school full-time and not work i would. for forever. but, alas, that is not a possibility for me. my guess for the future? i'll work for a while and spend my new found free time in the evenings amassing a greater comic books collection (i barely have any of the robins!) and learning how to swear in foreign languages. my brain needs a rest.

i'm also thinking of starting a new blog so people can read about my septoplasty adventures, if they so choose. mostly i'm doing this to repay the karma. i read some septoplasty blogs and they helped me, so i think i need to return the favor. have i ever mentioned before that i'm afraid of karma? i find it terrifying.

i had no idea!

who knew the prestige was not only a souce of very attractive men but also a source of historical facts! thanks steamjournal!

recently, one of the overly fertile female roswellians in HR spawned a truly beautiful baby boy and gave him an irish name. while the mother is the devil incarnate (only more putrid) the whole thing reminded me of this lovely 4th of july party i went to, oh, like 6 years ago. in addition to drinking daiquries while lounging on a trampoline, this party featured two of the most adorable kids ever - with two of the best names ever. at least, i remembered them being awesome, but i couldn't remember what they were, which was an-NOY-ing. so - i went to the internets which contains a site all about irish baby names! the baby girl was saoirse ("sear-sha") and the little boy was either finnley or cian ("key-in"). i just remember liking it a lot, and it was hard to say when drunk so my money's on cian. and for the record, i still think those are some pretty kick ass names.

also, it turns out that alanna is gaelic, not italian. i know, it shocked me too.

and the last new thing i've learned this week (that's right, i'm refusing to learn anything new until sunday morning): when you're scheduled for surgery you have to have 3 pre-op appts. yes, 3. one with your regular doc, one with the specialist/surgeon, and one with a random doc at the hospital. i find this rather unnerving. how many people does it take to make sure i won't die when i'm placed in a gas-induced coma?! on the plus side, i've already had an MRI for the first time (very cozy, i would have fallen asleep if it wasn't so loud) and i'll get to have an EKG! so, ya know, that's something to look forward to.

and in the interest of gearing up for st. patty's day - i'm going to wear green every day next week. i'm thinking i'll limit it to only grass and kelly green to make it a bit more of an effort.

oh no he dinnit!

do not even tell me that seyler just cut off all of peter petrelli's adorable comic book hair.

i. will. be. so. mad.

allow me...

... to sum up the pros and cons of red bull in 4 words: "it keeps you awake."

that's a good thing when you're at work. it's a bad thing when you got home at 1 AM and are still trying to fall asleep at 5 AM.

but at any rate, the party was a good time. everyone had fun (as far as i know). some people loved the catfish, some people hated the catfish, but all in all, i'm happy with it.

anyone else?

ya know when you go to a new doctor and they have you fill out a questionnaire? for the question "do you consume alcohol regularly?" does anyone else have a strict policy of deny, deny, deny?

at any rate, it's possible that a cure for my constant sinus and ear infections has finally been found. it's a septoplasty, and i don't think i'll be opting to have a free rhinoplasty thrown in. i'm pretty happy with the outside of my nose, and i'll like the inside once it starts working.

all in all, i'm pretty excited about this. i'll admit to being somewhat nervous after i found out that this isn't an "easy peasy" surgery since you're automatically prescribed vicodin, which, in my opinion is a little hardcore. why not just give me some oxycotin and call it a day? but, if two weeks of pain/minor drug dependency is what it takes to become a healthy nose breather instead of a sickly mouth breather - i'm all for it. just so long as it can wait til after st. paddy's day.

3...2...1...

9 days until my last presentation
18 days until the big event
22 days until my last midterm
32 days til my second favorite holiday
75 days til maddie's legal
76 days til i beat up greg
78 days til my last final
88 days until i graduate (yikes!)
93 days til freedom
95 days til the cookout in hamburg (i think my parents agreed)
97 (or so) days til i leave for europe
107 days til my lease is up - i'll take care of that before i leave the states

i like to have things to look forward to. :)

note taken

ya know you cleaned up nice for work when people ask in hushed whispers, "are you interviewing somewhere?" maybe i'll tuck my shirt in more often.

it's coming it's coming!

my new camera should be here on thursday! i'm telling you this for 2 reasons:

1. so you know you'll finally get to stop reading about it.
2. so you'll be prepared for hearing about it. or being blinded by it.

most likely unwarranted

it worries me when i take a two week break from blogging. mostly, cause then i fear i'll never do it again. sorta like when i ditched livejournal and never looked back. it starts as a two week break, then a two month break, and then before you know it it's been over a year.

so, this blog is really less about how much i'm loving "buffy" (even though i just ran out, but more on that later) and instead a reminder to myself that i like blogging and should do it more often. i guess i sure told me.

so...

i really like extra long weekends. this weekend was a double dose of weekend action. i took friday off and was given monday off. hurray for holidays! the only bummer is that all of my friends have work. which is a bummer cause i have no one to hang out with. but it's ok, i have plenty of things to keep my busy. like picking out my new camera. it takes me forever to pick out things that cost more than $50. i'm very free with my money, but only after i'm assured i'm getting the best deal possible. i suppose there're worse quirks i could have.

so, i was thinking about going into work today. but, in all honesty, i don't really want to. the office is creepy when you're the only one in it. not as creepy as my loft, but still pretty creepy. but, i do have a ton of work to do tomorrow, so maybe i'll just go in early. oh man, it took me like, 7.35 minutes to type that i was laughing so hard.

at any rate, today is the first day of the "lose 10% in 3 months" stint. i just ate some leftover arby's and feel like i'm going to die. note to self: since that's the same way you felt yesterday, maybe arby's isn't for you. and if i'm kicking arby's outta my life, that's an easy 3% right there. are there going to be any awards for who accomplishes the goal fastest?

in commemeration

And now, the story in the form of haiku!!!

First...

A swift thump
Blackness. View of sky
Next time duck.

Then…

A divot?
It is not THAT bad.
Late night? Worse.

Followed by-

What to do.
Johnny, Alex agree.
One hour more.

Finally…

Gab not dead?
Sweet. Now I can return
To my rest.

OPM

in this instance, the OP refers to mine and i need your help spending it.

there are 3 things in life that i really want right now. let me rephrase that. there are 3 materialistic things i want right now whose attainment is actually feasible. therefore, the super awesome job where i kick the shit out of big business and save the planet will not be appearing on this list. neither will any batman trades, i really don't need any help in that arena.

so, i need a digital camera. cause, really, it's pathetic that my camera is part of my phone. i'm 27, it's time i own something small and 'spensive. any pointers? i really want one that's good so i won't be tempted to buy a new one every 3 months.

an mp3 player. i need one. as you may have guessed, i'm in love with the second from the bottom. but, it's not compatible with rhapsody. anything you would suggest? functionality is key, but i'm a huge fan of the sleek, sexy lime green, as evidenced by everything i own.

furniture. the problem with this is that i'm planning on moving to DC in a year. not a lot of room for lots of matching bookcases in DC. but, for those of you who are in the market, home decorators seems like they have some nice stuff. i find myself enjoying the mission-style stuff.

so, there you have it. i have some extra funds, you have some extra advice - i'm sure we can make this happen.

whoopsie daisies...

or however you spell it.

i'm a klutz. always have been. but today i did something i've never done before. i knocked myself flat on my ass. i thought i ducked low enough to go through the little people door but no, i didn't, not be a long shot. i distinctly remember thinking, "was that the door frame?" and then i was on my back, staring at the ceiling, hoping my cat wouldn't get lost in the attic (she didn't). there was no blood (which is good - cause head blood is gross) but i am sporting a red spot under my red hair (so no one will ever know). and instead of it feeling like a lump, it feels like a divet. i know i did not just dent my head, but that's what it seems like. the only real annoying part - i always see double so i can't tell if i really hurt myself or not.

on a related klutzy note, the last 2 times i was a senior i broke my right ankle in january while bounding down mini-sets of stairs. you'll have to forgive me if i proceed with extreme caution on stairs for the next 23 days. i really don't want to make a hat trick outta this.

it's cause i said no to the cape, isn't it?

not even in the right universe, no less...

Your results:
You are Spider-Man

Spider-Man 95% Green Lantern 80% Iron Man 65% Wonder Woman 65% Hulk 65% Catwoman 60% Batman 60% Supergirl 55% The Flash 55% Superman 55% Robin 40%

You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

it's quite possible...

...that listening to regina spektor on repeat was not the smartest thing i ever did. that "fidelity" kilss me every time.

...that answering "turning 27" is the best answer ever to the question of "what're you doing for new year's?" not only is it witty, unique and not able to be used by just anyone, it also hides the fact that i have no idea what i actually am doing.

...that my new suitcase has me almost as excited to travel as i am to arrive at the destination, wherever that may be.

wonderful, wonderful

this really is my favorite time of year. as a wee lass it was all about watching the snow fall from my bedroom window and counting the days until i got to run downstairs at waytooearlyo'clock and open presents, twice! but a steady change has been happening over the last few years. i still love to watch the snow fall, but it's instead from the kitchen or living room. i now open my presents at normalpeopletimeo'clock (much to my mom's chagrin, now that she gets up at 5am) and my favorite part is seeing the looks on other people's faces when they open my gifts. and yeah, i like to open them too. more to see what reminded people of me (pink suede suitcase with black patent leather trim? oh yeah) and to make them smile too. but the most important part is really just spending time with the people you love, and loving the people you can't spend time with. it's about laughing at old jokes and making new memories. teasing your baby sister and realizing she herself has developed quite the rapier wit, all in good fun of course. but really, it's just about getting that warm, fuzzy, "i had a glass of wine feeling," without even having to have a glass of wine, but you do anyways. so, i have to agree, this is the most wonderful time of the year.

i'm a poet and, well, you know the rest

for you i had to write this ode
because i was feeling like a toad
and you got me out of that mode

i wasn't laughing, i was blue
and it's not a flattering hue
but you stuck with me like glue

you're a great friend, i can't deny
you made me feel better, that's no lie
all it really took was saying, "hi"

so my friend, i say "thank you"
and "i love you too!"
just know i'd always do the same for you

oh, it's out there all right

it's been said that i have a sort of addictive personality. i don't enjoy things, so much as devote all of my spare time to them. lucky for me, i only pick the coolest things to fill my days with.

lately, it's been the x-files. you borrow someone's dvd collection for the better part of a year and eventually the guilt from seeing them on top of your tv every day makes you finally pop them in. and oh my god i love it! i haven't watched an episode since david duchovny left and the T-1000 took his place. but now i'm on season 3 and as a mature adult am fully able to enjoy the brilliance that was chris carter. the scary ones are bloody scary (i still can't watch the ones about lamprey eel man) and the funny ones, well, i don't often laugh out loud at humans on the telly, but i do with these. it's just so damn enjoyable.

and the supporting cast! in the pilot seth green is there! and then in one episode they have both giovanni ribisi (whenever you need a freaky idiot - he's your man) and jack black. and even lil' kaylee from "firefly" is in an episode. i'm sure that finding famous people in small roles happened a lot in other shows from back in the day (ahem, "law & order"), but i didn't watch those shows, so i don't care.

so yeah, i miss the x-files. especially since i'll probably finish season 3 before the weekend. anyone have a copy of season 4 they want to lend me?

but i don't have an accent!

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Inland North You may think you speak "Standard English straight out of the dictionary" but when you step away from the Great Lakes you get asked annoying questions like "Are you from Wisconsin?" or "Are you from Chicago?" Chances are you call carbonated drinks "pop."
The Midland
The Northeast
Philadelphia
The South
North Central
The West
Boston
What American accent do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

the internet is for...

porn. and apparently, instant messenger is too. so yeah, if you got a message from me this afternoon about some hot chick, i'm really sorry. my computer, much like me, is sometimes prone to contracting viruses. unlike me, it gets over them quickly. so if you didn't like the porn, i'm sorry. and if you did, that's too bad cause i'm nipping this habit in the bud before my computer becomes a perv and grows one of those gay-ass johnny-type staches. not that there's anything wrong with that.

in summary...

open bars are good. taking full advantage of them at the boss' house, not good (from what i saw anyways).

i have a huge crush on daniel craig. it's not bigger than my crush on christian bale, but if he dies i know who's filling his shoes.

mad world by tears for fears is incredibly depressing; in a thoroughly enjoyable way.

the date's set

Saturday, February 3, 2007.

i don't know about you...

but i had a blast last night. it's not often that you get so many truly awesome ladies in one place at the same time, but when you do it is bound to be a lot of fun. although it kinda made me wish that i had more sisters. not that maddie isn't adequate, she's much more so, but if one is great than more must be better, right? and i really can't wait til she's old enough to come out with me. i always have a blast with her and i'd take her out now, but she looks 12. well, there's that, and i would spend the entire night making sure no strangers talked to her. i have a feeling that would quickly grow old for everyone involved.

so, tomorrow, the event i've been waiting months for finally happens. in june, yes june, i placed an order with amazon.com for several items. tomorrow, a man in brown delivers them. the three items i've been waiting for the most are "batman beyond: season 2", "nightwing: renegade" and "infinite crisis." finally, i'll be able to read the stuff that needs to be read before i can read all the other stuff that i bought. of course, i read the "countdown to infinite crisis" stuff so long ago, i doubt i remember all of it. this wouldn't concern me, except as the onion.com recently reported, "area man spent 18 hours on wikipedia.com and still doesn't understand the DC universe." poor man. even if i suffer the same fate, at least i can be comforted by a non-mulleted dick grayson. and really, what more can a geeky girl ask for?

for the atheist who still wants presents?

frankly, i think they are simply stunning.

hey, thanks for the well wishes re: my dad. he's doing ok and will be fine. besides the obvious bummer where he got hurt in the first place, the other bummer is you can't really sign casts anymore. they have all this gauzey stuff on 'em.

so, i found something scary out yesterday. i can cook. i always had an inkling that i might be able to, but it's true. i can. which sucks, cause now i have no excuse not to. other than the "i'm really lazy" part. but, we might as well put these talents to use. i know haley's been talking this idea up for at least 498 millenia, but let's start having swank dinner parties. heck, i'll even throw the first one. that way, i won't have any exceptionally high standards to live up to. :)

speaking of things i want to do, i want to go to the buffalo museum of science, the albright-knox (before everything i learn in college atrophies) and go dancing. who wants to be my new favorite person and go do these things? oh, and i also want to host "lost" viewing nights. alanna, i'm putting you in charge of obtaining the dvds. harley, you're in charge of not pulling out your life-like mouse toys at inopportune moments and scaring me in front of guests.

in the next month i have a whole ton of comics coming in. and season two of "batman beyond." please, remind me that it's healthy to go outside and interact with people once in a while. and that bringing the comics with me doesn't count.

family disFUNction

ah, my family. we're nothing if not mad-cap and zany. or at the very least, frigging odd.

the story begins with a young lass sitting in a class room waiting for the prof to arrive. she checks her cell, weary with ennui, hoping that someone has offered a distraction. "ah," she smiles to herself, "my dear ol' dad has called, and as it's not bio-dad, that's pretty rad."

so, off she traipsed to the common area to return the call and learn what so important that daddums had to use his cell and couldn't wait for the lil' pain in the ass to get off the computer.

"hello?"
"hey dad, what's up?
"nothing, what're you doing?"
"waiting for class to start, you?"
"oh, just laying on the couch. wanna talk to your mom?"
"sure, if that's who called. i didn't check the voicemail"
"oh, ok. jackie - it's gab. she doesn't know"
"hey, honey, how are you?"
"fine, what's going on?"
"well, your dad had an accident"
"a what?"
"an accident. he cut his hand with a chainsaw"
"with a WHAT?!"

at this moment our dear, fair maiden nearly shat herself.

"a chainsaw. he's ok though"
"explain 'he's ok'"
"well, he had the surgery to reattach the tendons today"
"reatt - nevermind. and?"
"and there's about 20 stitches"
"and?"
"and when he gets the cast off he'll need physical therapy"
"my dad's in a cast?! jesus fucking christ. did it at least happen at work?"
"yeah, he's on comp now"

our heroine is nothing if not pragmatic.

"well, i'm glad he's ok"
"yeah, so, how are you? give me some good news"
"well, umm, let's see. i don't really have any - i mean i'm ok... i haven't played with a chainsaw, in like, ever"
"that's good! definitely for the best"

additional pleasantries were of course exchanged with the matriarch, but the time soon came when all ladies were required to return to the class room. while the prof was most entertaining, thoughts of things other than law tended to pervade our student's thoughts. i dare say it would be quite safe to bet that a certain southern belle will be heading home to her family's ancestral home to survey the damage herself.

it's a numbers game

the official count is 55. i don't know where i got 65 from - i must've been including fallen comrades.

i just finished my 3rd episode of "firefly." i desperately want to stay up all night and watch the next 17.

i slept 22 hours this weekend and i'm still exhausted. either i have a horrible disease, a strong love of sleep or i'm just really lazy. my money's on choice 2.

so, i just got my gas bill and it's way lower than it used to be. hurray for new furnaces and 90% heat efficiency! (i made that percentage up.)

sunday bloody sunday

my plan for today was to get up early and go into work and do some web design and look through the pile of stuff inevitably sitting on my desk after being out of the office for 2 days. clearly, that is not what happened. yeah, i have a headache and i couldn't drag my sorry ass out of the house, but that's not entirely it. i really truly want to do the stuff this weekend. i just want to do it from the comfort of my own home. seriously. if i was doing roz work at my house i wouldn't even consider it work. nor would i put in for overtime. if i'm wearing my jammies it's not work. i don't think i would ever be given access to the network from home, but i might still ask. roswell - think of the savings! no more paying me time and a half! no more yelling at me for walking home after it's dark! no more me tripping the alarm because i forget that i need to be buzzed out after 6! and then there's the free time i'll have at work. time to do my filing, truly supervise my subordinates, and, oh yeah, maybe spend some time training with annie so the poor woman can retire.

but for now, i'm going to put some plastic on my windows, maybe do some cleaning, and definitely take a nap. one must be well rested when hard-coding websites.

this was going to be

a cute post about how i have really wierd dreams when i go to sleep drunk (diet pepsi in the fridge and trying to balance Little Theatre's budget?) and how harley went upstairs for the first time today and freaked out (clearly due to the little girl ghost in the white pinafore) and boy howdy isn't that funny?

but instead, i was getting ready to go to a family dinner and wait downstairs for my ride (us passengers in life have to be considerate) and i unlocked the upstairs door and started to walk downstairs when i noticed the outside door swaying in the wind and yesterday's mail blowing in the breeze. at which point my shit freaked out. nothing happened to me and all of my stuff is still here, but for all i know someone walked upstairs, looked through the dor window, decided all my stuff is crap and wasn't worth picking a lock. or someone tried on my shoes. or, and this is the option i prefer, any good karma i may have had was cashed in to make sure that humanity was kind for an evening.

at any rate, i am definitely embarassed that i was too drunk to remember to lock my own door. and i share this embarassment so that i'll constantly be reminded to not be an ass-hat. you don't have to say anything, just knowing that you know is a reminder enough.

how the mighty have fallen

when i worked for juno and helped people fix their internet connections i used to make a game out of finding ways around client logic's firewalls to use AIM. each time they changed their protocols (am i even using the right jargon anymore?!) all of us would make a game of out seeing who could find a new way through fastest. while i never won, i never lost either.

and now i can't even get hotmail on my work computer. it's just, embarassing. i used to actually know computer stuff - for real! and now all i know how to do is unplug a cable modem and hope that reboots it. i feel so efemulated.

how sweet it is...

there are few things in life as sweet as being the recipient of unconditional love. i'm not huge into the whole having a pet thing, but being the center of a fuzz-ball's world can really change that. here's a darling little squishy whose favorite part of the day is any part where she can curl up on/near/behind me. her every purr and mew says "thanks for giving me the chance to show that i'm worth the trouble of taking me home and not letting me get shot full of deadly drugs! you're the best!" and so, you feel like the goddess your cat thinks you are. for yes, you did save a life and you are the center of the universe. and then, one day, you'll be hurrying through your dining room, in too much of a hurry to look where you're going, and you'll feel your foot trip on something, hard. the first thought is, damn, my toes should really be aching, good thing i kicked something soft and squishy. the next, immediate thought is, i just kicked a kitten! i am the WORST PERSON EVER! and to think, some people wonder why i'm afraid to procreate.

monday, i'm gonna hate you

i really don't like mondays. they just annoy me. honestly, i think they would annoy me less if i wasn't forced to reminise about the weekend when i get to work. it was wonderful while it lasted, but now it's done, so please, let's just move on.

my computer was doing this wierd thing were every time i pressed ' it brought up the find window. i've never had that happen before. but now that it's stopped, i just went back and put all the apostrophes in. it's bad enough that i can't spell, i can't have bad punctuation too.

"the prestige" was a fantastic movie and i need to watch it again. while it was nothing like i expected it still far surpassed my expectations. rarely does a movie have ellicit such a strong reaction from me that i feel like i'm going to vomit and am silent for the whole movie. i didn't even once comment on the super-duper awesomeness of hugh and chistian in one movie! clearly, this ws a movie that didn't mess around.

questionable content is my new favorite webcomic. it, like the only other webcomic i read, also features indie boys and robots. you find something you like, just stick with it.

and finally, i have a kitty. her name is harlequin and i love her. you may call her harley and come over and pet her soft furry belly and listen to her purrs. her favorite things are getting pettings, watching batman cartoons (especially the ones featuring a certain clown) and blogging. the piitter patter of typing is like human purring. i really need to borrow a digital camera so i can share with the world the cuteness that is the tiny fuzz-ball harley. sometimes when she meows she sounds like a goat. unfortunately, she lived a tough life early on. she was homeless, hungry, fell in with the wrong crowd and had kittens when she was merely 6 months old. but it's ok, she was young and she needed the money and she's well on her way to reform. so this weekend, i'm going to the pet store to get her a pretty patent leather red collar. it'll fit her other nickname, which is harlot. i think she'll like it.

satruday night's alright...

i think we should go to prespa more often. which is not to say that i want to hear about any more stranger's sextrastrophes, regardless of how innocent they are.

hypochondria

i keep getting these stabbing pains in my palms. i hope it's not the stigmata.

WOO HOO!!!!

i just had to login again to share this important news - my strategy professor is not a total jerk. our midterm is postponed so that people can get their lives back in order and houses cleaned up. well, my life may have been undisrupted and i don't own a house - but i'm still happy to take advantage of this. WOO HOO!

a tale of two cities

the trip to NYC was wonderful. saw some beautiful foliage and got there relatively unscathed. i say relatively cause i'm still not sure my heart will ever be the same after getting hit by a box at a combined speed of 150 mph. you know you're scared witless when it takes a full 3 seconds to squeak out a "what was that?" props to alex for being a champ the whole way round. he put up with 2 girls, crazy new yorker drivers and didn't threaten to drive us into a pylon once. oh, and he drove the whole way, both ways. that's totally cool too.

NYC itself is a great town. i always enjoy my time there. i walk faster, talk grittier, and become cooler. at least, i like to think i do. and i bought super awesome greenich-village sneaks. and we super awesome comedy shows after super awesome mexican. thoroughly enjoyable.

so that was last weekend. this weekend we were in buffalo, cause ya know, we live here and stuff. oh buffalo, someday you'll make the news for something other than snow and sports teams that can't quite ever win the championship. but for now, we're known for the fact that when 164530 gallons of slush fall out of the sky, our trees crumble. i really feel bad for the trees. i actually get a lump in my throat when i see them, all broken and crumbly. and of course, i feel bad for all of the people without heat and power. but i have to say this about buffalo, when the tree chips fall, the people come together. there are stories everywhere of people sharing generators, helping neighbors dig themselves out, and just generally being nice. fools - why are you shoveling when it all just melted anyway?! just kidding - it's really nice to see so many people come together. it sorta makes you feel like there might be hope for the human race yet.

and i'm also really digging this having roommates thing. it's pretty cool - sorta like college but with less hangovers and better food. the pizza and wings are definitely of a higher quality now than they were then. and while i will admit at first that i was worried about having people find out about my idiosyncracies, that lasted all of about 5 seconds. i quickly remembered that i tell people all about how wierd i am every thursday, so really, if anyone was going to be scared it should have been them, not me. especially since i may inflict a rousing game of scene it on them tonight. even if they have their own power.

more of the same

• we are going to have so much fun this weekend. i'm really glad we're arriving at night because the skyline is just breathtaking that way.
• at least, that's how i felt 8 years ago. now i just fly - no skyline that way.
• holy heck - can you believe it's been 8 years since i rode in a van with andrea and anne and a cage full of mice and stopped in albany to visit scott swedish who anne was making it with and then later went on to trade up and date jenn keem and then first met johnny's nyc family and friends and coined the phrase "up against a wall?" wow, i think i might like this road trip a lot more. or at the very least, the stories might be more "family friendly."
  
• people who kick the back of my chair make me murderously mad. to the point where i start to fantasize about garroting them.
• according to coworker bill, i would make a good assasin. coincidence?
  
• so i'm kinda bummed cause i took my comforter out on sunday - i haven't seen it since it was cleaned in the spring - and it has ink spots on it. now, i love my dry cleaners - nothing like this has ever happened before. so i think next time i'm in to drop something off i'll mention it and see what they suggest. i can't prove they did it, but regardless, i'm assuming they'll offer to clean it again for free. which is cool - but i'm using it now.
• jumbo pretzels and fruit smoothies make excellent dinners
• it's stupid to teach a class on how to strategize like a CEO. i'm not a CEO. if i was a CEO, i wouldn't be in MBA school. if i started acting like a CEO, my ass would be out on the mud/we're-suppossed-to-pretend-it's-grass; that's not what i'm there for. therefore, i don't stay for the whole class.
• achtung baby is the best u2 album ever. and i don't hate it - i just don't relate to it like i used to. but it's still good and i still like it. so can we please go back to being friends now?
• i really hope someone is eating the leftover soda bread. or building a fort with it.
  
• maybe i'll make some more and take it to work next week. it's really fun to make.
  
• it reminds me of making hamburgers with play-doh.
• really big hamburgers.
  

just the facts

• show B is funny
• so is this. they should do one of these for Batman, but really, that's every issue anyway.
• everyone loves marineland. but no one likes little sisters who still haven't sent over the pictures (i'll tell you all about the racist goats and cute belugas once i have visual aids)
• switching johnny's ringtone to mr. softie is one of the best decisions i ever made
• i thought i had my playlist for "party like it's 1999" done, and then i saw a commercial for this, and i realize i'm nowhere near ready. it takes much more than a keg and some plastic cups people.
• while i'm being dorky, it's also a fact that i really want this
• i already have most of those songs on rhapsody. they go surprizingly well with the killers and nin
• you can't do a backwards "n" on blogger
• i don't really know how to do one with a computer anywhere
  
• i use the word "this" way too much
• there are a bunch of movies out about magic and witchy stuff and i want to see all of them
• right now
• i could also really go for some sushi
  
• why couldn't they take the picture last night?
  

top 10

this just in - UB's business school is #10 in the regional school ranking, according to WSJ. while i'm sure that means we're not even in the same category as harvard or yale, i still feel like i should be doing my homework.

oh my god i love rhapsody and i can't believe i waited this long to play with it

as requested...

my favorite song lyric is...
"love is a temple
love a higher law
you ask me to enter
but then you make me crawl"

followed closely by...
"did i ask too much?
more than a lot?
you gave me nothing
now it's all i got"

yeah, they're from the same song. the anthem for all teenagers who feel the sting of unrequited love. or maybe that was a hamburg thing. either way, i'm surprized this cd is still working. i still appreciate the artistry, even if they don't really apply anymore. but i should listen to my other favorite lyricist and just get angry and get some cleaning done. angry music is good ol' productive music, even if it isn't prodigy.

you know what, this cd is kinda boring. but i still like the lyrics. for once, i'm gonna throw rhapsody on and see if i can find something fun.

at any rate, alanna, i just beat you to the punch in your own fight. i told you mine, now tell me yours. :)

Understand this fact...

This is hilarious. Biggie Small is a genius - especially when translated into "whitey." Yes, yes, it starts off rather crude at first but stay strong, it's worth it. If you remain unconvinced, ask Puff Daddy.

Lyrics:

First things first, I poppa, freaks all the honeys

Dummies - playboy bunnies, those wantin’ money

Those the ones I like ‘cause they don’t get nathan’

But penetration, unless it smells like sanitation

Garbage, I turn like doorknobs

Heart throb, never, black and ugly as ever

However, I stay coochied down to the socks

Rings and watch filled with rocks

TRANSLATION:

As a general rule, I perform deviant sexual acts with women of all kinds, including but not limited to those with limited intellect, nude magazine models, and prostitutes. I particularly enjoy sexual encounters with the latter group as they are generally disappointed in the fact that they only receive penile intercourse and nothing more, unless of course, they douche on a consistent basis. Although I am extremely unattractive, I am able to engage in these types of sexual acts with some regularity. Perhaps my sexuality is somehow related to my fancy and expensive jewelry.

Lyrics:

And my jam knock in the Mitsubishi

Girls pee pee when they see me, Nava-hoes creep me in they tee pee

As I lay down laws like I lay carpet

Stop it - if you think your gonna make a profit

TRANSLATION:

I enjoy playing my music loudly on my car stereo. Apparently, women enjoy this also because they become sexually aroused when they see me driving. Oddly enough, when I visit the Native American reservations, some of the more sexually promiscuous Indian women attempt to seduce me in their homes. Their intent is to divest me of my earnings. Such actions are unacceptable.

Lyrics:

Don’t see my ones, don’t see my guns - get it

Now tell ya friends Poppa hit it then split it

In two as I flow with the Junior Mafia

I don’t know what the hell’s stoppin’ ya

I’m clockin’ ya - Versace shades watchin’ ya

Once ya grin, I’m in game, begin

TRANSLATION:

Understand this fact: you can have neither my money, nor my weapons. I suggest that you inform your peers that we engaged in violent sexual acts. Currently, I am rapping with my associates, the Junior Mafia. I’m having some difficulty understanding why you refuse to approach me. I am attempting to make eye contact with you through my expensive glasses, and as soon as you respond with a smile, I will approach you.

Lyrics:

First I talk about how I dress and this

And diamond necklaces - stretch Lexuses

The sex is just immaculate from the back I get

Deeper and deeper - help ya reach the

Climax that your man can’t make

Call and tell him you’ll be home real late

Let’s sing the break

TRANSLATION:

I prefer to open the conversation with light banter about my wardrobe and jewelry, then I like to discuss my collection of expensive cars. This is more than enough to convince you to have sexual intercourse with me. I am able to insert my penis further into you when I enter you from behind. Furthermore, you will be able to reach orgasm. I understand this to be a problem with your current sexual partner. He needn’t be concerned about your whereabouts. Please phone him and inform him that you won’t be home for a while. By the way, please sing the chorus of the song for me also.

Lyrics:

She’s sick of that song on how it’s so long

Thought he worked his until I handled my biz

There I is - major pain like Damon Wayans

Low down dirty even like his brother Keenan

Schemin’ - don’t bring your girl ‘round me

True player for real, ask Puff Daddy

TRANSLATION:

Your current love interest no longer wishes to hear your fabrications about the length of your member. After I had sexual intercourse with your woman, she became enlightened as to the proper way it is supposed to be performed; violently and immorally. It would be in your best interest to keep your woman away from me as my sexual prowess is very strong. If you are unconvinced, ask Puff Daddy.

Lyrics:

You - ringin’ bells with bags from Chanel

Baby Benz, traded in your Hyundai Excel

Fully equipped, CD changer with the cell

She beeped me, meet me at twelve

TRANSLATION:

Despite the fact that you attempted to win her at her doorstep with bags full of expensive clothes and a car (the lower end model Mercedes Benz which you financed by signing over your current vehicle) containing an expensive stereo and a cellular phone, your woman has contacted me through my pager indicating that we should rendezvous at midnight.

Lyrics:

Where you at? Flippin’ jobs, playin’ car notes?

While I’m swimmin’ in ya women like the breast stroke

Right stroke, left stroke what’s the best stroke

Death stroke - tongue all down her throat

Nuthin’ left to do but send her home to you

I’m through - can ya sing the song for me, boo?

TRANSLATION:

You, on the other hand, jump from job to job, barely able to maintain payments on the Mercedes Benz you purchased for your woman. Meanwhile, I continue to engage in sexual intercourse and commit lewd osculatory acts with your women. My only remaining option is to request that she leave my home and return to you because I have reached orgasm and no longer have a need for her presence.

Lyrics:

So, what’s it gonna be? Him or me?

We can cruise the world with pearls

Gator boots for girls

The envy of all women, crushed linen

Cartier wrist-wear with diamonds in ‘em

The finest women I love with a passion

Ya man’s a wimp, I give that ass a good thrashin’

TRANSLATION:

The ultimate decision rests with you. Whom do you choose as your sexual partner. I can take you on cruises around the world. I will dress you in the finest jewelry and footwear. You will be envied by women worldwide in your fine clothes and jewelry. There is a special place in my heart for beautiful women. I will defeat your man in an altercation because he is effeminate.

Lyrics:

High fashion - flyin’ into all states.

Sexin’ me while your man masturbates.

Isn’t this great? Your flight leaves at eight.

Her flight lands at nine, my game just rewinds.

Lyrically I’m supposed to represent.

I’m not only the client, I’m the player president

TRANSLATION:

You will be dressed in finest clothes on the runways of Paris. I will fly you to every state to shop for fine clothes and jewelry. You will enjoy sexual intercourse with me and your man will be forced to pleasure himself through manual stimulation. What a life! I’ll return you to LaGuardia in time to catch your 8 o’clock flight. The timing is perfect because I have scheduled a date with a second woman who arrives at the same gate at 9 o’clock. I’ll seduce her in the same way that I seduced you. I rap well and I am a positive reflection of my home town. Not only am I a sexually deviant, misogynistic, immoral, wealthy, male prostitute, but I also sit on the board of directors of the organization that governs others of my kind.

proof i need a digital camera

i took this picture at the erie county fair. i now see it everytime a livingston calls me.




this is the amount of mail i came home to after being in NYC for 4 mail delivery days. you may say i spend too much time shopping on eBay - i say Christmas should be every day.





on my way home from work today i saw this. is it a geo tracker? is it a lawn mower? it's GENIUS!