Friday, June 29, 2007
"this pile of boxes is all shoes, but not all of my shoes."
"oh, that's cool... wait, the whole pile is all your shoes?!"
"well, not all of them..."
"these boxes are really heavy"
"they're full of clothes"
"they're still heavy"
"remember when you dived in front of a car to save the remote?"
"dude! time warner will charge you $15 if you don't return the remote!"
"can we drink wine on our patio?"
"yeah, sure. all the time."
"i mean, starting now."
"umm, could we just sit on the living room floor instead?"
"good idea. this way i can watch the cops give me a ticket."
"i think our new neighbors have a kid named apache."
"i don't believe you."
"i couldn't make that up - it's too good!"
(one car load later)
"hey, the other kid's named bombay!"
"now you're the one making things up."
"no, really. i wonder if the third's named cactus."
really, it should not be this amusing. but i'm glad it is.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
...you ever plan on making it an early night and eric asks if he can come out it's really best to just say "no." oh, sure, he'll probably whine and show up anyways, but at least then you'll have made an effort to avoid the "just one more round" again, and again, and again...
...you were wondering, i'm not always as intelligent as i would like everyone to believe, but this always has entertaining results. allow me to demonstrate the fun by transcribing the following conversation:
e - "next time, we're hanging out in my neighborhood"
g - "you live two blocks from here"
k - "yeah, i had to travel from tonawanda!"
e - "did you take a sherpa?"
k - "yeah, i left it at gabby's with some water and oats"
g - "it's probably eating my shoes as we speak"
k - "you know sherpas are humans, right?"
g - "then why are you giving it oats?!"
...i mention a desire to go back to school, again, remind me of these following things please:
1) i hate going to class and having to study, albeit rare, though it was.
2) no need to break six figures on the student loans.
3) i don't know what state, much less city, i'll be living in next year. sorta hard to pick a school that way.
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
there are two things that are always going to happen when i try to take a nap. suddenly, my phone will start ringing non-stop. the other is some jackass will start doing yardwork. the "yard" in question today was my own. "yours?" you ask, and rightfully so. i don't have a yard! i wanted to shout out the window - "hey, 3 days before i leave you decide to tackle the vegetation and make this not look like a crackhouse? seriously?!" so, you know, that was cool.
also, if you or anyone you know has a cat that would enjoy a never-been-used scratching post/cubby hole/dangly toy thing, please come and take it. my cat is far too ghetto-fab to play with store bought things. she prefers old socks and shoe boxes.
and on the list of random things to do this week is to go to a kinda sorta not really sure if it is but most likley is job interview with an open bar thursday night. my aunt's taking me to the buffalo spree best of buffalo party (we're vips, natch) and they apparently want to contract me for some events. that's all well and good except for three things:
1. i'm not sure if my new dress is "schmoozing appropriate," but i'm wearing it anyways
2. there's a good chance once they learn that i don't plan all star night that they won't want to talk to me anymore. but really, that's ok - then i'll just hit up the open bar.
3. i have no idea what events buffalo spree does. i know all about shopping sprees, spree candy and i even know that the spree is a river in germany (thanks google!) but i have no idea what the buffalo spree does, other than publish magazines i've never read. care to help me out? there's some cat furniture in it for you if you do...
Monday, June 25, 2007
not that i should be hobbyizing today. i need to be packing. and i am, but it's so boring... it's just that i want to go do fun things outside like walk around the marina instead of sitting on my kitchen floor and figuring out which fake-tupperware containers are missing lids so i can throw them out. and i can't hear rhapsody in my kitchen. you see my dilemma, i'm sure.
but, the sooner i get this done the sooner, i get to go take that walk, right?
Sunday, June 24, 2007
btw, does anyone else find that an apostrophe is just not allowed on blogger?
alright, now that the potato chip issue has been resolved allow me to update you on packing. i'm not doing it. i am throwing stuff out like a mofo, but i have very few things in boxes. however, when i was asked by my family yesterday if i would like blank, where blank is a random object, i did have the mental aptitude to say, "no, if i take it, then i have to move it. this is an entirely unacceptable situation." i may have used those exact words.
my stomach hurts. i'm blaming the potato chips.
so, i had this huge mountain of clothes that i was going to get rid of becuase they didn't fit anymore. this made me sad, because i love my clothes but happy that i wouldn't have to move them. now i'm happy that they fit, but sad that i have to move them. hopefully kim only owns like, 12 articles of clothing so i can use her closet too.
i really need to call my landlord and find out what the "toilet in the dining room" situation is. additionally, now that i have a way to get the couch out of the apt (i'm really hoping you weren't kidding about lowering the couch off the balcony, cause i'm banking on that right now) now i need a way to get it to the new place. so, uh, anyone have a pickup truck or know someone who does? if yes, i will buy you two bottles of your drink of choice as oppossed to the one that everyone else gets (and yes, i know exactly what i'm getting myself into).
my sister's graduation was really nice yesterday, even though my camera kept being a jerk. so i don't really have any pics of my sister "graduating," but i have some good ones of what came after. i'll post them after i've done something that warrants a break.
and i am never eating potato chips again.
Friday, June 22, 2007
sometime during sample wednesday i also decided that it would be a good idea to not do anything i'm not willing to blog about. that being said, i have nothing to blog about.
Tomorrow is the 3 month anniversary of my surgery. That’s 3 months of not being sick. May seem incredibly small and insignificant a timeframe – but this is the first 3 months in longer than I care to remember that I haven’t called in sick, begged a secretary for a doctor’s appt, taken antibiotics or laid in bed asking “why, god, why?” so yeah, I’m rather stoked about the whole thing. Huzzah for modern medicine!
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
did you ever meet a person who made you stop and seriously ponder how they've managed to live this long without dying or having their face kicked in or dying because their face was kicked in? well, the queen of them all works in my office. and i dare say, she has won. she broke my spirit, i have no fight left. if you need me, i'll be staring dejectedly at the internets.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
"so where are you going to live?"
"i don't know"
"and where are you going to work after october?"
"i don't know!"
"and are you still going to europe for a mo nth?"
"i don't know!!"
"could you pass the wine?"
"i don't k- oh, yeah, sure - here you go."
at any rate, i will be answering the first question tomorrow and will be signing a lease. either at the awesome place with a back yard, or at the place that i think my former stalker once occupied. if it is that house, it's beautiful. i'd rather stay in allentown, but back yard house has forbidden me to take harlee with me, which i haven't had the heart to break to her yet. we'll see what the stalker house landlord has to say about feline occupants.
oh, i'm also going to have to skip the "house-cooling" party. i know, big surprize there. but, it turns out i can't do it on the 23rd cause my sister's graduation is later than we thought and promptly followed by a 50th birthday party (not for my sister). how much fun could a 50th birthday party be, do you ask? a lot. they have a hot tub and make the best damn martinis you could ever hope to taste. and they have a karaoke machine. but, i promise, promise, promise that i will have a house-warming party and that we can still play beer pong and flip cup in the dining room of whichever new place i choose. actually, we can still do that any night the last week of june at my current place, if you want.
and lastly, i took 113 photos today of the flowers at my parents and aunts house. that's just, a lot. and going to take forev-uhr to upload to flickr. totally worth it, though.
by the by, this is what i was talking about last night. it's even funnier in color. and it's on june 30. and i just added to my closet two more j.crew dresses. soon, the entire collection will be mine...
Saturday, June 16, 2007
i've also come to the conclusion that i give really crappy advice when i'm drinking. which is a shame, i could've used my A game last night. i'm going to go ahead and not be hard on myself since i'm a tad preoccupied as of late, but still, i would've liked to have been able to do/say more. fortunately, i think i'll have a chance to make it up tonight. this is something worth staying dry for.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
"wait, how did you know about the baby carrots?!"
"what do you mean, i love baby carrots"
"no, i love baby carrots - i eat them all the time!"
"ohmygod, we will be the best roommates ev-uhr!"
don't get me wrong, i'm entirely happy with the decision i made and would make it again, it's just i hate looking for apts. i hate it more than the actual moving process. it's like looking for a new job, except the deadline has ginormous reprecussions. i hate reprecussions. they're mean.
in other news, i am again gainfully employed. as a secretary. i got my mba, and now i'm a secretary. and not like the one from "secretary," unfortunately. le sigh. technically, i'm an executive assistant and i'll make the same pay for potentially less work/stress, but still, it sorta sucks. better than being unemployed, but not really a "resume builder." i can just imagine explaining this one to people i interview with. "so, what happened here?" "well, i, umm, at the last minute decided to throw my life in a tail spin and spend the next 3 months rinsing out coffee mugs, for the fun of it?" "great, we'll give you a call... later."
oddly enough, i still don't feel stress so much as an overwhelming desire to spend all of my time shopping. this cannot be a good sign.
Monday, June 11, 2007
i'm going blond.
drastic, i know. but really, i think it'll be ok. better than ok, even.
additionally, it suddenly dawned on me that the last time i went to a different city was 2 years (YEARS!) ago. that's pathetic, on my part. the thing is, when you date someone long distance you spend all your time off and money visiting them, or being visited by them. so yeah, i've been to nyc a lot, but no where else. i plan on changing that. first things first - toronto on june 30. what better way to say goodbye to my current apt then by being an expatriate for a weekend? a sure to be fantastic weekend.
also on the list:
sterling - greg, we really need to make this happen this year. fo' reals.
- male drinking buddies will ring to "tubthumping"
- bff and vice bff to "girls just wanna have fun"
- other females to "short skirt, long jacket" (not that any of you dress this way, but feel free to start)
- i think i'm going to give my sister the "mr. softee" ringtone. she loves ice cream more than anyone else i know.
- text messages will remain as "sex and the city," regular calls as "batman: the animated series" and lack of caller ID as "the x-files."
Sunday, June 10, 2007
- to have a plan
- to have a plan B. and plans C-F for that matter
- to wear your favorite pants 3 days in a row - and to hell with anyone who disagrees
- to listen to sad love songs, and not feel the least bit sad
- to make new friends and catch up with the old ones
- when all you need is your own company to have fun
- to get an ego boost and slew of free drinks from a cute boy, even if he is a crazed half scottish paratrooper from the royal canadian air farce who got into a knife fight with a pakistani during the war on terror and then makes sure your friend isn't pakistani after he opens the switchblade and then tells you he has a son, but doesn't like to talk about him. it makes him sad.
- to always have a good story to tell the next day
- to listen to your favorite songs cranked to eleven
- to be the center of attention (god, i love that)
- to walk the allentown art fest 3 times and not buy a single thing other than fresh-squeezed lemonade
- to be a pretty, pretty princess
- to be happy with the present and ecstatic for the future
- to know and really, truly believe that the best is yet to come
Friday, June 08, 2007
at any rate, one of the reasons i've stayed in this apt for 3 years despite my crackwhore of a landlord is my obsession with skylights. i love 'em. there is nothing better than laying on the couch and watching the rain stream down. i almost signed a lease that was $400 more a month than what i currently pay just so i could have skylights in 3 rooms instead of one. yeah, i gots issues. at any rate, i posted some truly craptacular pictures of a thunderstorm as seen through my roof on flickr. here's hoping it a) rains again in the next 14 days and b) i learn how to use my camera before then. wish me luck.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
sometimes i'm such a fecking cretin.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Sunday, June 03, 2007
issue the first
i'm not sure what to do about my hair color. should i:
a) return to the sultry red of yore
b) try a dark, smoking hot brunette look
c) continue down this path to blondom
d) keep it the same
e) pull a britney
issue the second
the original plans for a going away party have been scraped, as i'm not actually going anywhere, just yet. however, i do have this gigantic apartment that is begging for a party. we'll call it a "house-cooling" party, and thankee to the person who provided the name. it'll be just like a house-warming party except i'll give you the presents and i won't care how much you spill on the rugs. i'm just throwing them out anyway. but, because i'm incapable of throwing a party for less than 1,000 people (and i've done the math - they won't fit) i need your help. please tell me:
a) your favorite drink - otherwise i'm going to resort to martinis and beer, with margaritas for good measure
b) 5 songs you want to hear - and no, i will not play elliot smith
c) where i can find ping pong balls so i can skool all of you in beer pong
d) if june 16 or 23 is prefered
thanks for your help, and have a great day
at any rate - here's the internet space i'm wasting:
www.livejournal.com - updated 2 short years ago!
www.friendster.com - i think i've been evicted
www.myspace.com - it's got nuttin'!
in other news, i've recently lost my ability to sleep. this means that i'm going to have a lot more time to write, and it's going to be a lot less coherent. which may end up being fun...
Friday, June 01, 2007
"what's your mission?"
"getting away from you"
expect updates tomorrow.
see also - origins